On the Cusp of Transcendence

by Dani Gray

During the summer leading up to my 500-hour training, I spent a lot of time at the Dharma Yoga Center. I was living on the Upper West Side, and finding that the only way I really wanted to spend my time was taking class – being around Sri Dharma Mittra as much as possible.

In that time of my life, the devotion that blossomed within me was unprecedented; although I had done my 200-hour training about one year prior, I had never felt this level of unconditional love for a teacher before. Dharmaji awakened many other aspects of my human self that were previously hidden or diminished in their expression, and as my 500-hour training approached, I knew I was ready for the level of growth and transformation that awaited me – I craved the intensity of sadhana that was being offered through this program, and I couldn’t wait to start.

Now that I am teaching almost full-time, people ask me often about my experiences in teacher training, and I almost always tell them that the trainings I have done were, without a doubt, the best investments I ever made in myself – the seeds that were planted during the immersions continue to bear fruit even today, almost three years after the completion of my 500-hour.

Especially as I’ve begun to prepare for my 800-hour training, people ask even more questions:

“Are you excited? You must be so excited.”
“Wow, 800 hours? How does that fit into a week?”
“So what are you going to be learning, exactly?”
“Oh my gosh, you’re going to be a completely different person when you get back.”

All these questions and comments come to me with such pure love and joyful curiosity, from enthusiastic students and fellow teachers in my community; these reflections from others have brought me to very deep levels of self-inquiry – both getting clear within myself about my intentions for this training, and also realizing that there is, in reality, no way to prepare for the immensity of what lies ahead.

I remember the summer before my 500-hour training very clearly: it was the first time the 800-hour was being offered, and each day when I would take class with the trainees or catch snippets and sound-bytes from their sessions underneath the door to the studio, I would always think to myself, “I don’t know that I’ll EVER be ready for that training.”

Now I’m here, about to begin, and it’s still true – in so many ways, I am not ever going to be ready. To have the honor and privilege to learn such high-level, subtle practices, and be given the tools to teach these processes to others – it’s almost unbelievable, and to even think of the possibility humbles me.

To embark on the journey of the 800-hour training is, from my perspective, the ultimate extension and expression of the practice of Dharma Yoga. The essential pillars of this practice, of everything that Dharmaji shares with us, have come back to me over and over as the training has come closer, and their obvious necessity has become clear:

-Remain as a witness.
-Renounce the fruits of your actions (and any expectations).
-Abide in this eternal present.
-Be receptive, to the infinite Grace of G-d.

5-4-15Dani Gray currently lives and teaches in Sedona, Arizona. https://www.facebook.com/dani.gray.948